Being happy for others...

I have had too much time on my hands lately, and I have come to the realization that I put other people's happiness over my own.. It seems like when you do, you are so blessed, and things always seem to go your way...But sometimes it does come at a price... sometimes it can cost you your own heart. During those times, you have to reflect on what matters most to you, your love for someone, or your friendship... There is a huge difference between the two, and if you cross either one, it can cost you more than you bargain for....The fact is, if you can't love and care for yourself, you can't really care for someone else, and in turn things can become horrible, even deadly....I had a dream on night that someone I deeply truly cared about was in a bind, and needed my assistance, only for me to end up strangling this person, to the brink of death...When I woke up, I got a message telling me that I gotta take care of myself and live my life, and not try to save others.. This message was not a physical message, but a rather a spiritual one. I know it sounds weird, but I was hoping and praying for the wrong things. I was hoping to turn a great friendship into an everlasting love affair.. But it is not meant to be, her heart is with another, and I am sitting alone sulking when I should be moving on with my life.. I know it's not wrong to be happy for others, but it is wrong to be happy for them and not be happy for yourself... to be able to love others one must first love one's self.. I choose now to go in a direction in life, and the truth is I am happy for my friends, and thankful for my best friends, but more importantly, I thank God for giving me the insight that I need to move onwith my life, I was so focused on the wrong things, that I was about to lose the right things...My happiness has to have meaning to me, and if nothing else, that has to be enough for those who care about me...

sounds like you are doing a lot of soul searching.... this might be a very important time and turning point in your life...

and yes.. we can be happy for others.. but we also have to find happiness for ourselves...

LOL.. it's all I can do.. I have so much time on my hands now it's not funny.. I'm so used to a certain taking most of my time, and now things are different that I give myself self evaluations just about everyday...

well there you go... use the time to your advantage..